It’s me, Tyana. Keeping it inconsistent with the blogs. Five months later, things have changed for the better. Let me catch you up on a few things.
After leaving a position I had for four years I ended up turning the page on my career. It took awhile to adjust at first. I was used to a fast paced work schedule. I saw value in my productivity, I was treating my career better than myself. I was living in constant exhaustion and anxiety during my last year while working for this particular company. It took me awhile to realize I was never going to grow in this environment, no matter how much I sacrificed.
The month of May was my first month leaving the company. It was also the month my chains were unshackled from social media. (I was a social media consultant/manager) I downsized my social media interactions and deleted my Facebook account, I also deleted my personal Instagram account. I contemplated on deleting my photography account on Instagram for awhile. I couldn’t let go of the community I had. For the first time I was doing what I wanted and being who I wanted to be. Going along my own path without worrying about the image I portrayed, I didn’t have to be in a professional work environment that took away my identity. Don’t get me wrong this transition wasn’t easy, I felt so much hurt and often questioned my self worth. I can’t tell you how many times I talked with my therapist about this situation.
Five months later I feel like I’m in a better place. If I didn’t leave this unfulfilling environment I don’t think I would have challenged myself. This summer was the first time I set out to sell my prints, it was something I always put off because I didn’t have the time or energy to focus on. I also focused on my creative career. I set boundaries and said no to things that didn’t align with my vibrations.
Most importantly I planted my first garden. The idea behind a garden was to help get me grounded, mentally spiritually, emotionally and physically. I needed to physically be in contact with the earth to ground myself. My garden was a place of healing and gathering. It required a ton of patience though. This was major for me. In an instant world, patience is something I know very little of. It felt so rewarding to enjoy everything that grew.
At the beginning of the summer I learned that it was possible to stress your creativity and how it creates blockages. So I set out to exercise my creativity elsewhere. I found peace in creating crystal necklaces. It taught me patience and it was something I found happiness in. I also started to draw again, digitally. Something a bit different that brought joy.
I didn’t travel much this summer. I spent a great deal of my summer in self reflection. Nourishing the mind, body and spirit. I even stepped out of the usual therapy routine and tried chakra therapy. It was enlightening, I learned so much about myself and felt my vibrations shift. I also started meditation, this summer was all about getting grounded.
With October at my doorstep it’s hard to ignore the changes in temperatures and daylight. I’m learning to release things I have no control over. I’m currently in a funk, not entirely sure about my direction. On the path learning to just be. ~